


5-HT2A

by redpaint



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Ecstasy - Freeform, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Rated T for, Recreational Drug Use, Summer Break 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 21:16:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21125378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redpaint/pseuds/redpaint
Summary: George raised his eyebrows expectantly. “Now I’m not sure that this is a part of our official training regimen, but I won’t tell if you won’t.”





	5-HT2A

The trip to Portugal was meant to be fun, just a lads trip with a little more time in the gym than usual. They ran in the mornings, ate long lunches on the villa’s patio in the afternoon, and drank cheap beer at the corner bar at night. Rooming with George reminded Alex of a school trip, but if he was honest with himself, it was a bit of a relief. After the deluge of congratulatory phone calls slowed and the bottles of celebratory champagne ran out, once he had time to think about what a move to Red Bull could really mean, a tight knot of anxiety had settled in his stomach and seemingly had no intention of loosening. George, for his part, was mercifully _normal,_ still giving Alex shit over the same stuff he always had and pointedly not asking questions about the promotion. Alex was so grateful he didn’t even complain when George hogged the sheets.

Despite Alex's best efforts to avoid thinking about Spa, it was unavoidable. By the third night, he was about ready to crawl out of his skin. But then there was George, with a glint of mischief in his eyes and the tiny bag with twin pink pills he waved in front of Alex's face. It let Alex imagine another life in which they were just friends from uni, letting loose in the Algarve, with the money George spent on the tablets coming out of his dad’s bank account instead of his own six-figure paycheck.

George raised his eyebrows expectantly. “Now I’m not sure that E is a part of our official training regimen, but I won’t tell if you won’t.”

It was a terrible idea by any metric: who knew where George had picked it up, it could have anything in it, meth or something, and, well, he had heard that drugs were legal in Portugal but oh god what if the team found out—

He said yes before he could think his way into a no. There was something so deeply stupid and juvenile and hedonistic about pretending that the biggest day of his career wasn’t around the corner. If he fucked up now he would never forgive himself, and yet it was worth it for how George smiled when he plucked the bag out of his fingers. _While we’re young,_ Alex told himself.

The way George talked about it so casually made Alex think he had done it before, so Alex pretended he had too. The pill was in the shape of a little Mario star and when he swallowed it down it left a sweet aftertaste on his tongue.

⁂

Alex had only meant to catch his breath outside and get a little escape from the swelling crowd of people and stifling heat of the club. George found him in the smokers’ area, in the middle of a halting conversation with a Spanish student who luckily seemed to have no idea who he was and didn't mind that he was smiling like an idiot and bobbing along to the beat coming from inside.

“Oh, there you are! I thought I lost you,” George said, twisting and untwisting the cap of his water bottle in time with the music.

“Nope, just having a chat with Ines here.” Ines waved.

George shook her hand; the formality of it made Alex giggle. “Nice to meet you. God you two had the right idea, it feels so nice out here. This cold air is just like, awesome, yeah?” George seemed relieved when Alex nodded in agreement. “Reminds me that fall is coming—”

Alex waited for his stomach to lurch at the thought of the end of the break, but the feeling never came. George was right, this was awesome. He loved listening to George talk, he could do it for ages, just soaking in how confident he sounded. Alex had always admired that. Had he ever told him that?

“—you hear me?” George said. Alex hadn’t even noticed he had zoned out.

“No, what?” Alex was suddenly desperate to know what George wanted to tell him.

“I said I didn’t realize we were so close to the beach. You can hear the waves from here. Seeing the ocean would be so cool right now.”

Alex’s ears felt like they were stuffed with cotton but if he concentrated he could hear it; the steady rhythmic rushing had the same hypnotic pull of the thumping house music. Leaving wasn’t a hard decision.

⁂

They sat side by side on the edge of a wide flat rock that jutted out into the surf. Alex checked his phone: it wasn’t even five yet. How long had it been since they left the club? An hour? More? Long enough that the sky had turned from black to a deep blue and the breakneck pace of conversation had slowed at last into a moment contented silence. Alex had zeroed in on the sound of the waves, the deep rumble as they came in and the sizzle of the foam as they rolled out. The gentle mist of the surf grazed his ankles. Without really meaning to he had gotten sucked deep into a rabbit hole of self-reflection. It was like he was seeing his life from the outside and upside down.

There it was, in all of its intricacy and fragility, and he was acutely aware of just how insane it was and how _right_ it all fit together, despite what his anxiety told him. The clarity shocked him so much that he gasped a little. He wanted the water swirling under his feet to grow bolder, to splash up and shock him, test him. He wouldn’t flinch; of all the uncertainties he was going to face, he could start with this one. He could handle it. The rest would follow. 

“It’s so beautiful out here, I keep worrying that I won’t properly appreciate it so I keep just staring,” George said, barely above a whisper. He paused. “I’m glad we got to come here together.” The question of when they might be able to do this again went unspoken, hanging between them like the brine in the air.

Alex wanted to keep talking like he had just a few hours ago, when every thought seemed to pour out his mouth like a burst pipe, but organizing a thought and working the machinery of his voice was starting to feel clunky. When he spoke, his voice was unsteady and almost hoarse. “It’s nice that we can, you know, actually escape from it all for a bit. I keep worrying that I’ll spend the next however many years just waiting for times like these.”

“I’m sure a Red Bull salary can pay for plenty of trips to the beach.”

Alex laughed a little under his breath. “I don’t know, I might be cutting it close if I have to bring you along too.”

George shoved him a little with his shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’m sure Mercedes will have a jet I can borrow.” Alex snorted. The soft mist of the ecstasy-induced calm was slowly lifting, and his stomach twinged at the prospect of what was underneath it. He wanted George to push the bit forward more, distract him in that way he was so good at. But George just chewed his lip and looked out at the waves.

Alex swallowed hard. “_When_ you get that Mercedes drive, I hope you know I still want it all to be the same. Just us being us and none of the bullshit politics or whatever. Sometimes it feels like you’re the only one who can keep me sane.”

"Yeah, me too."

George shifted his weight and covered Alex’s hand with his own. Alex was struck by the realization that it had been ages since the last time he had really touched a friend like that; his fingers twitched against the wind-worn rock. Usually, this would feel like the start of some sort of wind-up, but George was rubbing his thumb over Alex’s knuckles and squeezing his hand so gently that he let himself relax back into the touch a little.

“I’m really excited for you, man, seriously. I can’t wait for people to really see how great you are,” George said.

Alex smiled weakly. “You deserve a seat like this way more than I do.”

“Oh shut up, you earned it.”

Alex looked up from the tide and saw that George was looking at him, studying his face in the dim pre-dawn light. He fought down a _Did I?_ and let himself gaze back. The breeze was blowing George’s shirt against his chest, casting the firm lines of his body in soft shadows. Alex thought about responding, thanking George for being so good and supportive and _there_, not just now but always. Thanking him for his dumb jokes and his easy laughter and those earnest looks that went straight through Alex’s carefully constructed walls every time, not just when he was feeding him serotonergic drugs.

Alex’s tongue was turning to lead. There was no way he could tell George how much he loved him without sounding like a total maniac. Instead of speaking he leaned forward across the rock and kissed him, soft and tentative and curious but unmistakable. George’s lips were slightly chapped, and they tasted like sea salt, but he melted forward against Alex, his hand holding Alex's a little tighter. That was all Alex needed to ask for more, sliding the tip of his tongue against George’s bottom lip. George, always so generous, opened up and slid a hand into Alex’s hair, keeping him close. Alex put a hand on George’s chest to steady himself but overbalanced, accidentally pushing George back onto the rock. George caught himself on his elbows, leaning back so he was looking up at Alex with an embarrassed smile. The delayed rush of kissing George hit Alex all at once, his heart skipping a beat. There was no question in his mind that he needed to do it again. “Was that—? Can I—?”

George, like always, stopped him thinking, hauling him in by the front of his shirt and pulling him half on top, so his back was to the ocean. “Fuck yes,” George whispered, and kissed him again, still so slowly, so methodically. Alex pressed back into him and let his body meet up with George’s wherever he could, amazed with how well they fit together.

Just as George was kissing down his jaw, an especially strong wave crashed against the rock. The spray splashed their legs where they were still dangling over the side. George, surprised by the cold, let out a gasp, but Alex stole it with a kiss. George’s mouth against his: that was something he could be sure of.

**Author's Note:**

> the d.a.r.e. cops are gonna come after me for this one
> 
> this is over twice as long as I intended it to be but now I'm extremely soft for these two 
> 
> some old same old: it's fiction, keep it out of the hands of real life people, please and thanks
> 
> [redpainterly on tumblr](https://www.redpainterly.tumblr.com)


End file.
